Apocalipstick Book Release Tour

Tagline: Life is bad after the apocalypse . . . the undead just made it worse. 

Book Description: 
“My dreams pre-pandemic included  a high school graduation party before attending college and marrying an attractive future lawyer. Instead, I’m praying for a long, sharp knife and a big gun to survive the undead.” —Jenna 

Jenna Martin lives in a world gone insane after a mysterious pandemic kills much of the population. Being alive after an apocalypse is bad, but it is made worse when the multitudes killed by the disease return ravenous for human flesh. Jenna, in serious trouble and pursued by undead, heads to the safest place available, a cemetery. 

Ready to give up, she finds the strength to persevere for one more night and meets a group of survivors willing to take her in. The group caravans to Virginia, where they plan to inhabit an isolated inn called High Point, but the undead are always close behind. Packs of zombies, known as Streakers, attack, leaving Jenna and the other survivors battling for their lives and racing toward safety. 

Once safely isolated at the inn, the group rebuilds society and Jenna begins a relationship with Caleb. Although he withstood the virus, he has not come out unscathed. He and some others now labeled the New Race have changed into what many would call zombie kin—vampires. Jenna falls hard and fast for Caleb, which causes more problems that she ever expected in the fledgling society. But there are worse things than vampires and zombies searching for her, and they arrive at the inn’s door ready for destruction.


Excerpt 1

Glass shattered in the next room and footsteps crunched over the broken splinters. What had once been a tall, middle-aged man in a business suit, was now a bloated corpse in rags crusted over with blood and pus. The baked-by-the-sun Streaker wore a wrinkled face with the consistency of an old raisin. His right arm hung limply, dislodged from the socket, but both hands made continual grabbing motions.

 Lacking any grace, the creature staggered to the bedroom door and stopped. It sniffed, searching out its next meal. Blood poured from Jenna’s lip, where Tundra had hit her. She wiped it away, then retrieving the piece of wood. Sensing the movement, the Streaker turned its undead eyes on her. Some of its skull had been torn away, exposing the rot. It lumbered and stumbled over the chair in its path, giving Jenna desperate seconds to ready herself. Arm raised, eyes dead and unblinking, it came, dancing with death. It reached out to grab her.

Jenna ducked, then swung low and hard. “I must have gone brain dead. I can’t think of one good zombie joke right now.”

The creature staggered back, but then surged forward. Jenna rammed the edge of the board into its stomach.

“No comeback from the undead. There’s a no brainer.”

 It writhed against the constant pressure of the wood. A trail of intestines spurted out, staining the tattered remains of clothing. Jenna gagged at the stench.

“You, my good sir, are too gross for words.”

The undead groaned, plowing forward. Decaying brains leaking from its nostrils and eyes.

“That all you got for me?” She stepped back, hoisting the board, and swung. The head of the creature flew sideways, but it continued forward, emaciated fingers scratching. She drove the Streaker over to the left with a repeated, steady swing. The wood sank into a shallow layer of skin covering the undead’s overripe, bloated belly.

Upon Caleb’s return, he moved to Jenna’s side. She stepped back and leaned against the window. Caleb, hatchet in hand, forced the Streaker into a corner. A noise at the window had her spinning around. A hand shot through the glass and into the room to claw at Jenna’s face. Outside in the darkness, lifeless eyes found her. The undead rammed against the window, spraying glass. Jenna stepped away, and seconds later, a loud crack caused splintered wood and glass to fall to the floor along with pieces of the zombie’s fingers. With a catatonic stare, the Streaker pushed through the opening, tearing its flesh against the jagged edges of the frame.

Jenna flashed back to the cigarettes and matches she saw in the room. Fire was exactly what she needed now. She searched for the matchbook that had laid on the floor, but the room was in disarray thanks to the fight. Something bumped behind her, and panic rose inside her. Dropping to her belly, scanning the floor, her fingers reached under the bed.


About the Author:
Lisa Acerbo is a high school teacher and adjunct faculty at a local community college. She lives in Connecticut with her husband, daughters, two dogs, and horse. When not writing, she mountain bikes, hikes, and fosters dogs.
Website: https://lisaacerbo.com/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/apocalipstick_

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisa.acerbo.5

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/laft100/

Amazon GC Give Away

It’s back and the zombies are bigger and badder. Jenna is more kiss-ass.

Apocalipstick is less than your morning coffee . $2.99 on Amazon Kindle. Plus the chance to win an Amazon gift card. https://amzn.to/3c1J4FK

Life is bad after the apocalypse . . . the undead just made it worse.
“My dreams pre-pandemic included a high school graduation party before attending college and marrying an attractive future lawyer. Instead, I’m praying for a long, sharp knife and a big gun to survive the undead.” —Jenna
Order today: https://amzn.to/3c1J4FK

Enter the give away: https://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/d04251234183/

I Want a Normal Life

A satire about the pandemic based on the classic, “I Want a Wife” by Judy Brady.

I belong to the classification of people known as pandemic quaranteamers. I live in a bubble with my tight-knit social circle that includes a husband and a few family members. And, not altogether incidentally, I take a firm stance on personal protective equipment and social distancing. As such, I lack a normal life.

Not too long ago an extroverted and skeptical friend of mine appeared on the scene fresh from a recent excursion to a bar. He had dinner and drinks, which was, he claimed, scrumptious. He is looking for another outing. As I thought about him while I opened a can of Campbell’s vegetable soup one evening, it suddenly occurred to me that I, too, would like to return to a normal life that allows me to be social and venture out into the world. Why, you ask, do I miss my normal life? 

I would like to go back to having conversations where I can bear witness to facial expressions, not worry about six feet of separation, and, if need be, eavesdrop on the next table for inspiration when I lack something witty to say. I also want a life that will inspire me and provide new experiences. I want my normal life to dissipate my current feelings of boredom and malaise. 

I want a life that enables me to not only plan but keep doctor and dentist appointments. Actually, I want a life so over scheduled with appointments, I struggle to remember them. I want a life that permits me to visit the doctor when sick without fear of becoming even more ill.

I want a normal life that nurtures me socially and intellectually. My life should make sure I have time to socialize with peers; that provides walks through the park, trips to bookstores and beaches, and coffee dates. I want a life that will allow me to peruse clothes at the mall and take them to the cleaners after they have been worn to work. And if I venture out on a weekend excursion, I’d like to live without fear of the dog sitter bringing something worse than scooped poop into the house with her. 

The return to a life full of services would be nice. I want to not worry when my car has an oil change and tune up about how many hands touched the steering wheel or if they wore gloves. I want a life that will allow me to hire someone to keep my house immaculate. I want a life that will allow me to rest in an exotic location. I look forward to an existence that will allow me to go to a hotel and have someone pick up after me. 

I want a life that gives me a reason to shower, dress up, and go out to dinner, bored as I am of canned soups and bagged salads. I want to eat with gusto. I want an existence that allows me time off from cooking meals and provides numerous options other than drive-thru take out. I want to plan menus involving more than a single weekly visit to the grocery store or an Amazon Pantry delivery. I want some place to be.

I want a normal life where I will not fear returning to work because of the constant news feeds detailing every aspect of the pandemic. An existence that allows for five days a week, in-person schooling without the fear of exposure after a student removes their mask to sneeze. I want to see faces in my classroom. I want a life that will allow me to teach in front of a full class of smiling (or sneering) faces, the ability to peer over a student’s shoulders, and have one-on-one, in-person conferences. I want a life that will allow for Socratic seminars and whole group discussion with students sitting in a circle around the classroom. I want noisy peer reviews and department meetings in a single room rather than by Zoom. I want a life that takes care of my student’s needs as much as my own.

When I return to my normal life after this pandemic one, I want the liberty to INSTANTLY replace my present life with that one. Naturally, I will expect my fresh, new normal life to involve little responsibility, few restrictions, and much freedom. 

Who wouldn’t want a normal life?

Valentine Day Treats

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Welcome to Ravenous Fables. Here you’ll encounter fairy tales from across the globe, reimagined and reinvented by a group of talented authors. Expect scintillating stories to get your heart-racing and prepare for sweet seduction. Searching for steamy mystical entanglements? You’ve come to the right place. Includes the delicious writings from these inventive authors: Jack Archer, Tiffany K. Brooke, Rynn Collins, Melissa Cummins, A.C. Dawn, Andra Dill, T. Elizabeth Guthrie, Sheri Lynn, E.S. McMillan, Jennie L. Morris, Kate Seger, Dakota Star, Whitney Zahar

*WARNING* This collection of short stories involves extensive, mind-blowing, adult themes and is intended for Adults Readers Only!

The Sweet Life is also free! Want to curl up with a rough and tumble cowboy and a bad-ass NYC exec? Watch the fireworks explode as opposites attract. Get your copy just in time for Valentine’s Day.